It has been an emotional week. My wife attended my oldest son’s IEP (Individualized Education Plan) meeting this week and received a shocking revelation – our son may have Asperger’s Syndrome. At least that is what the teachers seem to suspect. Last year, during his final IEP in the Eclipse preschool program (he has had assistance for speech/behavioral problems for some time that were thankfully caught in a local early intervention program thanks to my wife), a different teacher said the same thing.
Last year, it made me defensive. I argued there’s nothing wrong with my son. He’s a normal boy. He’s just like I was.
But here’s the thing I did not want to admit at the time but am starting to accept – I’m not normal…
Sure I’ve heard the “Weirdo” label for a long time – since early childhood — and it has become something about myself I celebrate as I’ve grown older. Gonzo was always my favorite Muppet, after all. But to learn that there may be something tangible that is physically/mentally/emotionally different. That was something I was not ready to accept. Especially when one considers that Asperger’s is a form of high functioning autism and the undeserved societal stigma associated with autism. There’s no way I’m autistic, I thought to myself. But now that I’ve delved head-long into researching the topic excessively, I think I was wrong.
Now here I am, a year later, after first denying my son’s probable prognosis, throwing it up to “boys will be boys” (while having my own boyhood as the only reference point with which to gauge), but now I have seen the marked difference in how my son interacts socially with kids his age, have seen how other kids sometimes make fun of him and he does not realize they are being mean, have seen him struggle and grow violent beyond his own (or anyone else’s) control if his little “rituals” become disrupted like a scene out of Rainman, and I have had to reassess my stance.
I have learned that Asperger’s is thought to be inherited, and usually a direct link from the father is found. Having told my mother, she read up on it and thought it explained so much about my own boyhood. She said it possibly explained a lot about her own father (a famous dentist who revolutionized the field, very focused on the details of the mouth and teeth, but apparently with his own unique quirks).
My mother said she always knew something was wrong with me. I would have tantrums for no reason at dinner time, not allowing anyone else to eat. I would look possessed and no amount of discipline or spanking was going to change me if my little rituals were not kept. I suffered insomnia and would not let anyone else sleep in the house until I after I fell asleep, and was a nightly terror for my sisters and my parents. My parents had to drag me to school while kicking, screaming, scratching, biting, and seemingly demon-possessed due to my discomfort of leaving my home and comfort zone. I was dragged to psychologists, my mom hoping to figure out what was wrong while being constantly criticized by family and friends for perceived poor parenting skills (which was not the case at all). When in my own world as a child, my family would always shrug off my eccentricities and say “that’s just T.J. being T.J.” It’s funny how my family said the same thing about my son and his quirks. My mother read the criteria and called me up, very emotional, professing she was relieved. It was not her fault. I must admit I feel some of that same relief about my son’s behavioral ticks, knowing they are not my fault. She said she recognized the syndrome immediately and that it described me as a child perfectly. She just wished she had known about this condition when I was a child.
I’ve always known in the back of my mind that there was something different about me. It’s a remarkable coincidence that I spent so much time while earning my education degree studying psychology and special needs. When working with special needs’ kids, I could often see a reflection of my younger self, especially in those who suffered autism. I could identify with them more than I wanted to admit at times. Now, I’m starting to understand why.
My parents and sisters have seen many of the same traits, quirks and eccentricities I displayed as a child in my son. I noticed them, but now that I know what they are (or at least seem to be), and as sad as it makes me, I’m also relieved and grateful to live in a time where these things can be diagnosed and have a school system — in addition to friends and family — with resources to help us cope as we travel on this journey with our son. Accepting my difference, I am thankful for it. At least I can look my son in the eye and tell him “It will be okay. I’ve been there." It’s tough to spend so much of your life feeling ostracized. But as we grow older, mature, and learn our own triggers, we can control ourselves and learn to live productive lives. As a man, I feel okay in my own skin – in fact I really like being me.
I have a lot more to say about this…It’s not officially diagnosed for either of us, but the more I read, the more Aspergers seems to fit. Look for more posts about this in the future. I intend future posts about how other adults/parents perceive parents and children with Aspergers and the dangers of commonly accepted (wrongly encouraged) forms of discipline. I will talk openly about the diagnostic process and suggested treatments.
I am making the decision that silence on a subject like this is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?
Asperger’s Syndrome reference/fact for the day (definition from the DSM-IV): http://myweb.lmu.edu/jdevine/AS/DSM4.html.
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
We have Asperger’s Syndrome in my family as well. My cousin’s diagnosis actually helped tremendously, because it helped the family know how to deal with the aspects of it that negatively affect socialization, without crushing the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse. If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
“…the aspects of it that are far more of a blessing than a curse”
Those are what I’m trying to focus on. Thank you so much. That’s good to hear, and I appreciate the encouragement very much.
“If you remember to treat it as a human variant and not a “disease,” you’ll quickly find that the biggest challenge is the need to continually explain it to those less informed and less tolerant of difference.”
-I’m starting to see that already. come to think of it, that can be said for just about all of our many human variants…
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
“I am making the decision that silence…is not the way to go. It’s better to be open. I don’t know, maybe someone out there can find inspiration here?”
Most definitely. You’ll find more support, even as your provide it. Do you read haddayr’s LJ? I’ve learned a lot by following her experiences.
::HUGS::
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
Thanks Lisa. I’ll have to check out haddayr’s LJ…
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
HUGS! Sounds like you’re both going through a lot right now!
If I were you, I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm. Plus schools are quick to label a kid whatever is the “in” diagnoses of the moment. Five years ago schools were making it sound like every damn kid in the country has ADHD. Now suddenly everyone is an Aspie. Again, it sounds very likely in you and your son’s cases, I’ve just known too many wanna-be psychologist teachers.
If you and/or your son really do have Asperger’s, I’m sure there will be lots of things you can do to help him and lots of places you can go to for support.
You sound like a great dad. 🙂
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
I hate to be cliche, but all I can say is, thanks for sharing that with us, TJ. I bet you can’t imagine how much it will help your son to know you suffered the same problems yet grew up to be a fine, loving husband and father. Good on ya!
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
Thanks, man.
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
Thanks, man.
Thanks, man.
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
Thanks, man.
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
Thanks, man.
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
Thanks, man.
thanks for sharing and I hope you know we are all of us here for you whenever you need
Thanks, man.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
First of all, hugs.
Remember that a diagnosis does not change what, and who, your child is. Your child is already here. You know and love your child. A diagnosis is nothing but a tool to help you help him make the best of his opportunities.
Aspergers diagnosis should not be a scary thing. Kids with Aspergers are high functioning and as a rule grow up to lead normal, although usually geeky, lives. By normal I mean that they can as a rule function on their own, live on their own, graduate from college, and lead productive lives. Children with Aspergers have average or high IQs, and many use their intelligence to balance the areas where they are lacking, and educate themselves about social interactions, human emotions, etc.
There are many therapies, classes and programs for children on the spectrum that help deal with socialization issues.
Lastly, you should look into occupational therapy evaluation and a sensory profile for your child. It is very likely that he is overstimulated by his environment. A few simple changes in the home can make a big difference in terms of problem behavior/tantrums.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Oh, hai
I was going to ask you why you just added me, but I suspect I know, now, after reading this post. 🙂
What you describe sounds exactly like my son Arie (diagnosed with, among other things, Asperger’s), of your own childhood. And like his grandfather’s childhood. My husband was a calmer kid, but no less weird.
Please — ask me anything.
I am so glad your mother is getting this information, too. Even knowing what I do, I sometimes think I must be the worst mom in the world.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Me. Too.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Me. Too.
Me. Too.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Me. Too.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Me. Too.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Me. Too.
Oh — in case you didn’t know this (I’m guessing you did, but . . . ), Asperger’s wasn’t even in the diagnostic manual in the U.S. until 1997. There was no way for your mom to know.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Me. Too.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
I agree that silence isn’t the way to go, and applaud the way you’re handling this. My hat is off to you, sir.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
Gonzo was my favorite muppet, too.
I think it’s a great idea to talk about autism and Aspergers. Whether you get the official diagnosis or not, your research and discussion may help us find techniques that work — as individuals, as a society. As poets and fiction writers, we can also raise awareness and make a difference; we can increase understanding and tolerance, help ourselves as we help others reach for their potential.
We’re all in this together.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
One of my best friends is an Aspie. I adore her. Also, I have a friend on my journal that is a mod for a terrific, supportive Asperger’s community. I can refer you if you are interested. You have my support. Thanks for being brave enough to post this. Thanks for taking it head on.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Re: Oh, hai
It is funny. I went right to TJ’s profile to see if you were friends. If you weren’t I would have made the introduction. I consider you both very good friends of mine. Thank you, young lady, for offering support and help. I can’t think of a better source. You never fail to inspire and ground me.
TJ, really get to know this lady and her husband (if you don’t already). They are amazing people.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Thanks for everything.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Thanks for everything.
Thanks for everything.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Thanks for everything.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Thanks for everything.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Thanks for everything.
Oh and my husband and I are adult ADD. I know what it is like to be different, in a different way. His oldest son was diagnosed as well. It is a different “variant” but you have a shoulder anytime.
Thanks for everything.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
” I’d get an official diagnosis from a real doctor before doing anything else. Not saying it isn’t likely, I’m just rather leery of diagnoses made by teachers and schools — they’re often VERY quick to stick a label on ANY student who doesn’t fit the norm.”
– I agree wholeheartedly and we’ve started down that road. This is a part of why I was so defensive last year during his IEP. While getting my education degree I wrote several papers about this and feel strongly that some teachers simply do not understand some of the physical/hormonal differences between boys and girls and how those effect classroom behavior. There are teachers out there who I feel are too quick to label anyone who acts up in class with a diagnosis and seek out medication to calm children down so they’re easier to deal with (and we have no intention at this point of medicating our son — we just hope to find behavioral tools, support, and suggestions from people who have been there). Thankfully, I don’t feel that’s the case here.
It’s been getting involved in his basketball team and going on field trips — actually seeing how other kids his age behave to compare and analyze, how he tries to interact with them and fails, seeing how they interact with him in ways he seems to not comprehend, and seeing how he is a loner lost in his own world — that changed my initial defensive reactions. No one should feel that isolated at 5… Other kids seem to want to include him at times, but he seems unable to interact with them in ways they understand even though I know he really wants to. He’s just different — like I remember being. He does have friends, but he struggles to play in ways that are reciprocal.
It may not be Asperger’s this is true. It could be one of any number of issues that we’ve been researching and discussing. But I’ve been reading Tony Attwood’s “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” and it is wild how much it resembles what my son is going through and my own childhood. It could almost be a biography and sends chills down my spine when I read a lot of the personal stories, symptoms, and case studies. When reading it, I keep saying to my wife “Look at this! This is me! I do that!” It’s been a revelation to a possible explanation for many aspects about myself I have always struggled with and can see my son beginning to deal with. No matter what it is, there is a defined and measurable difference in behavior/speech patterns/gestures/interests/social skills/etc. that we will diagnose with professional help and figure out.
It was a HUGE step for me to admit there might actually be a problem. My wife has wondered if he was autistic from the time he was about 18 months or so — for example, how he would sit down to watch TV and we could scream his name, and he would be so focused he’d appear deaf — but I continuously said “Nah. I used to do the same thing. He’s just really focused.” I have been in denial that there’s a problem for a long time…Looking back I see the symptoms and signs were there all along.
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me.
Thanks, man.
Thanks, man.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
There’s a ton of hope if this ends up being his prognosis. He does have heart. He does have a bright mind. In the end, that’s all any of us really need, I think… He’s still my son and he’s still the one of the two coolest guys I know (his little brother being the other).
I will look into the “overstimulated” thing. That could definitely be an issue in some situations.
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
Re: Oh, hai
Thank you. I look forward to browsing through your posts. It sounds like you’ve been there.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
I told her so. When I was younger I was labeled possibly ADHD/Gifted. When she mentioned my odd social and behavioral issues, the psychologist just told her to use more discipline. That’s the way things were back then, I guess.
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Re: Oh, hai
I intend to…
Thanks. I appreciate it.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
I agree, no matter what the final diagnosis, there may be others out there interested in hearing how this diagnostic/treatment process goes.
Thanks for everything.
Thanks for everything.
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
It sounds like you guys totally have this under control! I reiterate my great dad line. This is just great. Your son is so lucky to have you guys as his advocates. 🙂
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Ah, yes. And I can imagine how well “use more discipline” worked.
I know I shouldn’t be mad at the psychologist, because everyone was in the dark, but it makes me mad, anyway.
Me. Too.
Me. Too.
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I’m really grateful I took so many classes about teaching special needs while in college. I actually considered going into it as a career at one point, oddly enough.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
I wouldn’t say we have it under control just yet…but we are working on it.
Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
T.J.,
First, I want to say that it seems a bit as if you are leaning toward blaming yourself for you son’s possible condition. If that’s the case, please try to shake it. You are not at fault for what’s in your genes, DNA, etc., especially considering you did not know about any of this.
Second, while all this might be scary, congratulations on at least moving in a direction where your son and possibly yourself can discover what seemingly makes you different from others. And I don’t use the word “different” with any negative meaning whatsoever. “Normal” is often boring, and I don’t really consider anyone “normal.” We all have our differences, we just don’t always show them.
Third, sorry to hear you’re closing the magazine, but it’s perfectly understandable for your personal reasons and because you want to be able to do more writing. I myself have turned down many editing/slush reading offers simply because that’s not where I want my writing career to take me.
Good luck to you and your family,
Ty Johnston
tyjohnston.blogspot.com
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
I bet that would have been one heck of a challenging career! It’s certainly paying off now though. 🙂
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
That it is. It’s odd how things work themselves out. I don’t believe in coincidences.
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
Thanks for this, Ty.
I have to admit I have spent some time this week blaming myself. I know this is not constructive behavior, but it is a natural reaction…
I understood you meant no harm, and still don’t see my “differences” as a bad thing. I probably won’t seek out an official diagnosis for myself because I do not consider my “differences” an impairment in any way at this point in my adult life. As a child and young adult — it was a problem at times, but reading “The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome” by Tony Attwood I see that I naturally used a lot of the coping strategies mentioned in the book to treat myself instinctively.
As an adult, I have a loving family, friends, supportive co-workers, and a steady job. I have taught myself over the years to explore and treat the emotional aspects of my “differences” through writing.
I am just hoping that knowing there is a problem, diagnosing the problem, and getting professional help in dealing with the problem will make things easier for my son. Looking back, I am often surprised I survived to become the man I am today. It was an uphill climb.
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!
Oh man.
I only saw this due to reading the post on the SFF forum today.
I don’t know what to say but I think you’re making the right decisions and I think you’ll notice a big change when the editing is gone (and I so know about that!)
If there’s anything – you know where I am!